Spring is definitely here, and so are the allergies that come with it! I’ve been battling sinus pressure and allergies for about a week now, and thankfully my head is clearing enough to think straight! Well, most of the time. 😉
Something shifted in the past week or so, from my scripture reding to my perspective on keeping house…and most significantly in the direction my family and I are headed towards. As far as my time reading scripture, I was reading Jeremiah intently. And after finishing the book (from chapter 15 through the end), I had intended to go back and read the first 14 chapters. But as I started reading, I felt a pull towards the Psalms and away from Jeremiah. In fact, the more I read Jeremiah, the more I realized I shouldn’t be reading it. I’m not reading straight through the Psalms, just focusing on a couple of them a day and writing out the verses that speak to me specifically. It’s been different, to say the least, but the verses that stand out have been a healing balm to my soul. I’m loving this time with the Lord, and I’m excited to see what He has in store!
My perspective on keeping house has shifted too. Often, I’m just not focused on keeping the house clean. And guess what? For about a month, it was clean. Every day, or at least nearly. And then I was sick. Hardly getting off of the couch for the headaches and dizziness. (With pregnancy, I can take a handful of medications. Not many to choose from, and none nearly as effective as I’d like!) The house is still messy, and I’m still working on getting it back in order. But. I”m also planning on getting rid of our excess. We have too many toys, too many books, too many clothes…and I’m sick of it! I’m ready to throw or donate more than half of our possessions (if not two-thirds!) It’s not like we use them anyway! I’m also oddly at peace with how the house has been kept lately. I don’t know why, but “Be still and know that I am God,” has come to mind more times than I can count. I’m ready to do something big, though, and I just hope that I can muster up the energy for that!
Finally, our direction as a family has changed. It’s a hope and a dream now, but we’re working towards my husband speaking full time. Even typing that out is scary, but I know that this has been the call on his heart since before we were married. We have had several hard years of being broke as well as broken in spirit, several years of trying hard to fit in and realizing that we’re just square pegs that won’t fit into round holes. And that is okay. Because God made us both to function the way that we do. It’s not a mistake or an error on our part: it’s how He has chosen to use us in this world. Yes, I’m uncertain and uneasy. But I know that God is in control. So I’m being still and resting in Him. He knows where we’re going and what we’re doing, and even what we’ll be doing when we get there.
I’m incredibly thankful for His guidance and leading. Maybe we’ll see the end of this dark tunnel before too long.